when am I going to find a path that isnt covered in fortune cookies..... Stop guessing whats going to happen dumb ass. stop danceing you...you....I mispelled dancing. but stop it anyway. anyway, I hate the word anyway. so, besides that, I am a little lost in the process lately, everything is really annoying. waking up is annoying me. breathing. eating. existing. and most of all blinking. god damn do I hate blinking. I'm trying to sort out the endless filing cabinet of my mind to do a little clean up. you know, outwith the things in my life that are bad input and more to do with the cheery things that vomit butterflies and pixies dust. but pixie dust is still dust, and dust is still filth and filth is still filthy. so out with that too. but there needds to be some kind of balance is this turn table madhouse. its like my existence is on a turning platform. and all on the walls are posters with advice or ideas or decisions on them. and at the time Im looking at them they all seem completely agreable. but, seeing how the platform is always turning I keep seeing different things, so I keep changing my mind. so thus the filiing process began and it wont stop now. I really need seclusion or a change of atmosphere cause the air around here is like breathing myself. which is never healthybecause theres only so much of me here to breath before I breath myself up and poof Im gone. well Actually I'm in my own blood stream, which is to say trapped inside of myself, which is to say, impossible. so la-di-da.